Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Wedding Stress Rant
So there are some things I need to get off my chest to relieve some stress and move forward so I can enjoy this coming weekend, which is my bridal shower and bachelorette party. First off I just want to say that I am really excited to get married and have also really enjoyed planning everything myself with a little help from my sweet and awesome friends. Jesse and I have been engaged for over 3 years and the reason we didn't get married right away is because we really wanted to be able to afford a nice celebration that we could enjoy and have all of our friends and family there to support us and be there for the very special occasion that I am sure will only happen once in our lives. Just Once, So in my opinion weddings are a pretty big deal...it not like you can make up for missing a wedding or special events involving said wedding by catching it next time.
Text I received from my mother today regarding my bridal shower " Oh baby I can't afford 2 come down. It is all I can do to come 2 your wedding. I love you. I hope it is a good party"
1. My mom has known about the wedding for longer than most of my friends...because she is my mom. She was one of the first people we told when we set the date. But she knew we are having this August months before the official date was set. Just to be clear that is about 8 months worth of notice.
2. My mom has plenty of money to drive all over Maine to go kayaking almost every weekend. As well as taking a vacation a few weeks ago. In which she stayed in a hotel for four nights here in Portland...when she could have stayed with us for free.
Maybe I am over reacting due to the stress of trying to finish school and working out all the final details of the wedding. But I thought my mother of all people would want to be there for me more than anyone else. That she would want to be there for me enough to put a little money aside for her travel expenses...(which by the way is only a 2 hour drive. So we are talking maybe 50$ for gas)
I have not responded to the text yet... I just don't know what to say. I am angry, sad, and truly hurt. I am afraid that if I respond in this state that I will say something I may regret. So I am hoping this little rant will help me to cool off before I talk to her. "It's all I can do 2 come to your wedding" Really! Thanks Mom so glad that you are trying so hard! Really makes me feel special.
Okay end rant...if you read thanks for reading/listening.
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Sweet Jenni....it is hard to know what to say in this situation...I love you, more than any words, or time spent with you and your beautiful family, could ever truly express. I think you are justified in feeling sad, and hurt, and even a little bit angry right now. This is a stressful and overwhelming time for you. This year has not been easy, you stood by as my mom passed, and supported my brother, your children as well as yourself during that tough time. Your mom is still here, so I understand why you want more than anything, for her to be "here" on your special day. At this time, you need to know one thing. You deserve for her to be there, you deserve for her to be happy for you, and you deserve to not feel "worried" about "why" she isn't coming....I suggest you sleep tonight, and respond in the morning. You are smart, and strong, and you'll know when to respond. Mistakes are made sometimes, and just know that you have so many people who care for you, and are going to be there to support you on this very special day. I love you from the bottom of my heart. My mom won't be there on the wedding day, and I feel your sadness to the core. We will have the best time Saturday...and I think letting your feelings out is a good thing. You have a big heart and I love you for that! I've got your back, now, and always! <3
ReplyDeleteHey Sis! Jayme here, Im really sorry that mom is being so selfish. I wish there was something i could say to her to wake her the hell up without hurting her feelings or upsetting her, but the last like 5 years has been all about her it feels like. seems like she never gives a shit what is going on in my life or yours, every time i go visit her and jim all they talk about is their stupid kayaking trips. i know how you feel, they've had me on the back burner forever now. and i know it hurts to feel like you're not important to your own parents but keep your head up, this is your wedding! enjoy it with or without them! love you jenni, sorry i cant be in portland this weekend, i hope the party is fun!
ReplyDeleteThanks guys! I am feeling much better. Yes she should have prepared a little better so she could be there. But that is her loss and I am not going to let it bring me down. I am going to have the best weekend with all my best girlfriends. I can't wait I am so excited! Thank you both for being so supportive and actually being there for me. Love you both so much.
ReplyDeleteGood! Dont let other people negativity bring you down! love you jenni hope you all have fun this weekend! sorry im missing it!
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